This paper has grown out of a broad

This paper has grown out of a broader panel study on educational strategies adopted by
transnational families in Japan and the impact of this on the children‟s identity or sense
of self.2. Drawing on the first wave of a panel interview survey of couples in
international marriages and their children living in a major metropolitan area of Japan,
this paper explores the path that led to marriage and meanings both initially and
subsequently attributed to marriage, intimacy, parenthood and family by the partners.
The foreign partners in these marriages are all English speaking, raised in Western
countries and well educated. The social and educational backgrounds of the Japanese
spouse are more varied. The three Japanese husbands have been educated to higher
degree level, whereas only one of the six Japanese wives completed a full university
degree. The remaining women completed high school only (one) or two year junior
college (four). While pointing to the diverse patterns of lifestyle and intimacy aspired to
and achieved in these marriages, this paper will also emphasize the structuring role
played by Japanese ideas of familial obligation and parenthood that impact strongly on
all the couples‟ marital relationships regardless of initial commitments.