15000:06:09,420 --> 00:06:10,779Aft

150
00:06:09,420 --> 00:06:10,779
After a day

151
00:06:10,780 --> 00:06:13,080
After a dayof extensive interviews, I
found us a perfect nanny.

152
00:06:13,090 --> 00:06:14,480
- Mm.
- Degree in child development,

153
00:06:14,490 --> 00:06:16,750
grad student at UCLA, tons of experience.

154
00:06:16,760 --> 00:06:18,589
Fantastic! When do I get to meet her?

155
00:06:18,590 --> 00:06:20,259
How about now? I mean,
Charlie loved her so much,

156
00:06:20,260 --> 00:06:21,389
he wouldn't let her leave the interview.

157
00:06:21,390 --> 00:06:23,260
- Oh.
- Emma?

158
00:06:24,600 --> 00:06:26,800
Hi.

159
00:06:28,400 --> 00:06:31,530
I'm Emma, but all my friends call me Emmie.

160
00:06:31,540 --> 00:06:33,439
Oh. Are those your friends?

161
00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:35,839
Ah.

162
00:06:35,840 --> 00:06:37,539
Oh, gosh.

163
00:06:37,540 --> 00:06:39,339
Charlie undid my button.

164
00:06:39,340 --> 00:06:41,910
Oh. Charlie's first button!

165
00:06:49,850 --> 00:06:52,489
Jules, tell me you haven't
ordered the wedding dress yet.

166
00:06:52,490 --> 00:06:55,019
No, not yet. I love it,
but it's so expensive,

167
00:06:55,020 --> 00:06:56,389
so I'm still thinking about it.

168
00:06:56,390 --> 00:06:57,789
Okay, well, think no more,

169
00:06:57,790 --> 00:06:59,390
because I have the perfect dress.

170
00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:01,229
Mom sent it from Australia.

171
00:07:01,230 --> 00:07:02,960
This dress has been in
our family for years.

172
00:07:02,970 --> 00:07:05,799
Darling, you can be a part
of the grand tradition.

173
00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:07,530
Oh, this is so fun!

174
00:07:07,540 --> 00:07:09,339
- I'm gonna try this on.
- Do it.

175
00:07:09,340 --> 00:07:10,439
(knocking)

176
00:07:10,440 --> 00:07:12,269
Ah, Kate, I need a favor.

177
00:07:12,270 --> 00:07:13,870
No.

178
00:07:13,880 --> 00:07:15,940
You don't even know what I'm gonna ask.

179
00:07:15,950 --> 00:07:19,879
I can tell by your spastic
sprint and your needy stare.

180
00:07:19,880 --> 00:07:22,179
I'm not interested.

181
00:07:22,180 --> 00:07:25,119
Listen, I got to have my trainer back,

182
00:07:25,120 --> 00:07:26,850
and he can't work because of you.

183
00:07:26,860 --> 00:07:29,220
Well, I can't work because of him.

184
00:07:29,230 --> 00:07:31,729
Do you know that he licked his finger

185
00:07:31,730 --> 00:07:34,699
and traced it around my mouth?

186
00:07:34,700 --> 00:07:38,569
Like some kind of saliva lip gloss.

187
00:07:38,570 --> 00:07:41,969
I have to live with that.

188
00:07:41,970 --> 00:07:43,669
Just give him one more chance.

189
00:07:43,670 --> 00:07:45,269
He spit-glossed me, Will!

190
00:07:45,270 --> 00:07:46,709
Fine, but, look,

191
00:07:46,710 --> 00:07:48,379
the truth is...

192
00:07:48,380 --> 00:07:50,309
Wait. I-I can't tell you that.

193
00:07:50,310 --> 00:07:52,050
I'd be... I'd be betraying his confidence.

194
00:07:52,880 --> 00:07:55,249
Please, feel free, betray.

195
00:07:55,250 --> 00:07:56,849
Okay.

196
00:07:56,850 --> 00:07:58,649
But, listen, you promise
not to say anything?

197
00:07:58,650 --> 00:08:01,789
He told me the reason he was
so nervous and off his game is

198
00:08:01,790 --> 00:08:04,520
'cause he thinks you're
just so incredibly hot.

199
00:08:04,530 --> 00:08:06,690
That makes sense. Go on.

200
00:08:06,700 --> 00:08:10,060
Yeah, so, you know, he just
got all up in his head.

201
00:08:10,070 --> 00:08:11,969
I really think you should
give him another chance.

202
00:08:11,970 --> 00:08:16,070
Well, he is packing a python.

203
00:08:18,910 --> 00:08:20,939
Hey. Did you find a nanny?

204
00:08:20,940 --> 00:08:22,539
- Yes.
- No.

205
00:08:22,540 --> 00:08:24,340
Let me ask you guys.

206
00:08:24,350 --> 00:08:26,849
Should we hire a super hot nanny?

207
00:08:26,850 --> 00:08:28,879
- Definitely not.
- No! - Well, well, hold on!

208
00:08:28,880 --> 00:08:32,589
Are you suggesting that we
deny this poor woman a job

209
00:08:32,590 --> 00:08:35,389
in the house that I live
in just because she's hot?

210
00:08:35,390 --> 00:08:37,589
How can you even be considering this?

211
00:08:37,590 --> 00:08:40,690
It's like asking for trouble,
and then paying for it.

212
00:08:40,700 --> 00:08:43,129
This is outrageous.

213
00:08:43,130 --> 00:08:44,729
"Should we hire a hot nanny?"

214
00:08:44,730 --> 00:08:46,629
(stammers) Even the question is offensive.

215
00:08:46,630 --> 00:08:48,069
If you replaced

216
00:08:48,070 --> 00:08:49,699
the word "hot" with "black" or "Jewish,"

217
00:08:49,700 --> 00:08:52,139
we would not be having this conversation.

218
00:08:52,140 --> 00:08:54,139
Come on, Will.

219
00:08:54,140 --> 00:08:56,279
Oh, it's fine for the hots
to model our swimsuits,

220
00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:59,549
but God forbid we let them
care for our children.

221
00:08:59,550 --> 00:09:01,279
Look, I don't care what
she looks like, all right?

222
00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:03,149
I just want to hire the
best person for the job.

223
00:09:03,150 --> 00:09:04,780
And out of all the people that I met,

224
00:09:04,790 --> 00:09:07,050
Emmie by far had the best credentials.

225
00:09:07,060 --> 00:09:09,259
Did she have really big credentials?

226
00:09:09,260 --> 00:09:13,229
Okay, so if I find someone
with better credentials,

227
00:09:13,230 --> 00:09:16,999
who doesn't look like "Emmie,"
you'll be just as excited?

228
00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:18,129
Absolutely.

229
00:09:18,130 --> 00:09:19,799
No.

230
00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:21,169
Jules: All right.

231
00:09:21,170 --> 00:09:23,370
Here I come.

232
00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:30,879
Aw, darling, spectacular.

233
00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:32,279
What a vision!

234
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:33,910
I got to call my mum!

235
00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:37,980
What is happening?

236
00:09:37,990 --> 00:09:39,789
It's Lowell's great-grandmother's

237
00:09:39,790 --> 00:09:40,789
wedding dress.

238
00:09:40,790 --> 00:09:43,290
That she was buried in?

239
00:09:47,460 --> 00:09:49,859
(laughs): Hey!

240
00:09:49,860 --> 00:09:50,960
How's it going, buddy?

241
00:09:50,970 --> 00:09:53,999
(deep voice): Hey, man, how are you?

242
00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:55,099
Charlie?

243
00:09:55,100 --> 00:09:57,239
Hi.

244
00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:58,869
Hi. Who are you?

245
00:09:58,870 --> 00:10:00,539
This is our new nanny, Sam.

246
00:10:00,540 --> 00:10:01,509
Bobby: Oh.

247
00:10:01,510 --> 00:10:03,609
- Hi, Sam.
- Hey.

248
00:10:03,610 --> 00:10:05,479
Nice to meet you.

249
00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:07,280
Excuse me.

250
00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:10,920
Word, please?

251
00:10:12,290 --> 00:10:14,650
(chuckles) Are you serious?

252
00:10:14,660 --> 00:10:16,019
You said if I found someone

253
00:10:16,020 --> 00:10:17,659
with better credentials, I should hire him.

254
00:10:17,660 --> 00:10:19,829
Him? I never said anything about a him.

255
00:10:19,830 --> 00:10:21,290
Where'd you find this guy anyway?

256
00:10:21,300 --> 00:10:23,359
Spraying cologne at the Beverly Center?

257
00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:25,799
Actually, he has a master's

258
00:10:25,800 --> 00:10:28,330
in child development, and he's
the oldest of seven siblings,

259
00:10:28,340 --> 00:10:29,939
so he has plenty of
experience. He's perfect.

260
00:10:29,940 --> 00:10:32,100
Yeah, well, I can see why
you think he's perfect.

261
00:10:32,110 --> 00:10:34,169
Oh, please. I just want
what's best for our son.

262
00:10:34,170 --> 00:10:36,639
- Who wants to meet the tickle monster?
- (laughing)

263
00:10:36,640 --> 00:10:38,040
I do!

264
00:10:38,050 --> 00:10:40,679
I mean, Charlie does.

265
00:10:40,680 --> 00:10:42,549
Sam: Tickle, tickle, tickle.

266
00:10:42,550 --> 00:10:44,250
Tickle, tickle...

267
00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:49,389
I mean, it is a whole
new world having a nanny.

268
00:10:49,390 --> 00:10:51,889
I actually had time to
take a shower this morning.

269
00:10:51,890 --> 00:10:54,729
You know, you do look quite nice, actually.

270
00:10:54,730 --> 00:10:55,790
Mm.

271
00:10:55,800 --> 00:10:57,359
She's dressing up for the nanny.

272
00:10:57,360 --> 00:10:59,929
(chuckling): What are you even...

273
00:10:59,930 --> 00:11:02,799
That's crazy.

274
00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:04,269
It's great.

275
00:11:04,270 --> 00:11:07,010
You shaved your legs for the
first time in six months.

276
00:11:08,310 --> 00:11:11,339
I wish it were for me, but
I'll take what I can get.

277
00:11:11,340 --> 00:11:13,509
Wow, seven years of marriage,

278
00:11:13,510 --> 00:11:16,510
and the romance is still white-hot.

279
00:11:18,020 --> 00:11:19,419
Hello, hello.

280
00:11:19,420 --> 00:11:21,219
So, gave Zac another chance,

281
00:11:21,220 --> 00:11:23,350
and guess how many orgasms he gave me.

282
00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:24,459
I don't like this game.

283
00:11:24,460 --> 00:11:26,189
Three. The best of my life.

284
00:11:26,190 --> 00:11:28,059
I didn't have to teach him
a thing. It's so weird.

285
00:11:28,060 --> 00:11:29,929
He was completely different this time.

286
00:11:29,930 --> 00:11:31,599
(chuckles)

287
00:11:31,600 --> 00:11:33,699
What?

288
00:11:33,700 --> 00:11:34,929
Uh...

289
00:11:34,930 --> 00:11:36,400
You're welcome.

290
00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:40,000
What do you mean?

291
00:11:40,010 --> 00:11:42,370
Well, I gave Zac a few tips
during our training session.

292
00:11:42,380 --> 00:11:43,939
So, uh, by the transitive property,

293
00:11:43,940 --> 00:11:46,810
it is I who rocked your world.

294
00:11:48,550 --> 00:11:51,379
I who gave you all those orgasms.

295
00:11:51,380 --> 00:11:53,119
How-how is that even possible?

296
00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:54,749
It's not. He didn't.

297
00:11:54,750 --> 00:11:55,919
Oh, but I did.

298
00:11:55,920 --> 00:11:57,219
I pulled the strings.

299
00:11:57,220 --> 00:11:58,759
I am the puppet master.