wanted to ask if you minded me call

wanted to ask if you minded me calling her Lauren.”

My heart missed a beat when I heard that and I stopped moving for single second but then kept going. For years I had wondered what she had wanted to say before I had gotten into the cab. There had always been that voice in my head that had told me I had imagined it to be more meaningful than it probably was. Hearing the actual answer was way more than I ever could have expected.

“Are you telling me that you wanted to name your daughter after me?” my own voice shook subtly and I wasn’t sure why my eyes felt damp all of a sudden.

“I still kind of did…without being too obvious”, Camila whispered unsteadily and the tentativeness was palpable.

I pulled back just enough to see her. She avoided my gaze and her entire body stiffened again. My chest was heaving while my hand squeezed hers still in mine. Every fiber in my body wanted to cup that beautiful face and kiss her senseless after hearing that. But I was also immobilized by the overwhelming nature of my feelings for her. Slowly letting go of our interlaced fingers, I used the now free hand to place it on her cheek.

“Camila”, I breathed and stroked her jawline to her chin, lifting it tenderly so she would look at me. We had stopped moving because of the intensity of the moment. What I didn’t realize was everyone else breaking their dance and suddenly erupting into thunderous applause due to the end of the song. The abrupt and loud noise all around us had the younger one jumping before she met my gaze.

On the one hand I was disappointed in the moment ending. One the other hand I was more hopeful than before after hearing what she had said about naming Lara.

“I have to get back. Lara is probably home and I don’t want her to worry where I am since it’s late”, Camila said hastily and I could only nod before she was already walking ahead. There was so much going on in my head but neither of us spoke on the entire way. She had named Lara after me, it kept echoing in my head. I still couldn’t believe it and it would probably take some more time than the walk back to let that new piece of information sink in.

Camila reached the front door and had the keys in her hand before she turned around to face me.

“How long are you staying?” she broke the silence but avoided looking at me for too long.

“Why? Do you want me to leave?” I responded with a gentle laugh but it wasn’t really joke. She didn’t answer but kept looking at the wooden floor of the porch. “I won’t be staying very long. But I was hoping to see Lara while I’m here. Is there any chance I could spend some time with her tomorrow?” The younger one fidgeted nervously after my question. “If you don’t want me to take her somewhere else, I could spend some time with her here if you don’t feel comfortable otherwise. But I promise I would take good care of her.”

“No, I know you will”, she replied quickly and took a deep breath. “I’m sure she’d love to see you. Come by around two then you can pick her up.”

“Alright, that’s perfect”, I beamed with joy at the prospect of seeing Lara. “Thank you.”

“Goodnight, Lauren”, Camila turned around in a hurry and disappeared behind the closed door before I had a chance to say anything else. But I wasn’t discouraged. It could have been a lot worse. Some hope was definitely still there, I said to myself.

-

I rang the bell of the French home for the second time. The nerves were still there but I wasn’t as much of an emotional mess as yesterday. I knew I was about to see Lara and probably Camila too. My heart was jumping with excitement as the door opened and my former Boston teammate opened up.

The previous night had been quite eventful and I had replayed every single detail until I had fallen asleep. But today was a new day and I wanted to keep going where I had left off. Bonding with Lara was at the top of my list for today. My gaze was focused on Camila as I greeted her but was quickly distracted by a high-pitched voice.

“Pancakes!” the three-year old almost screamed from the hallway and I bent down instantly when I saw her running up to me.

“Come here”, I demanded completely endeared by her reaction and felt her little body crushing into mine with a hug.

“How are you?” I asked while pulling away but leaving a little kiss on cheek. “Did you miss me?”

“Yes”, she nodded frantically and bit her lower lip just like Camila.

“Do you want to know what I have planned for us, or do you want it to be a surprise?”

“I want to know”, she squealed with enthusiasm, the hazel eyes lighting up.

“Ok, I found this place that is all about American food and guess what they have on the menu: Pancakes”, I revealed and grinned widely because the girls’ eyes were about to pop out of their sockets. “I thought we could go there and eat some. But first, we’ll go the park nearby and play some soccer. Does that sound good?”

Instead of getting an answer verbally, Lara wrapped her arms around my neck again. I smiled satisfied with that res